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I'm Good

"We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated" - Maya Angelou

It's common courtesy to make verbal gestures such as "Good Morning" "Have a nice day" "Please" and "Thank You". Think of what your typical response is when an individual asks "How are you?" or "How are you doing today?". This type of question really isn't a means to find out exactly how you're doing unless placed in the context of care. Generally its used as an additional greeting or communicative point of contact. The number one response that most people tend to go for is "Im doing good, how about you?". Let's stay there in the response for a moment. When you make the statement "I'm doing good" does that mean at this moment? Does that mean your good for the day? Does that mean life is good as it stands? Is this response an attempt to mask true feelings because things in life are currently in shambles? The bigger and most important question is... Does the person asking the question really care about your response?

What I've come to realize is that we get into the habit of always being "good" even when things are the exact opposite. There are many people fighting battles on the inside and trying to cover wounds that may be the result of an incident or a life of traumatic unresolved feelings. I raise this notion simply to point out the art of checking in with yourself. Are you really doing good? Ask yourself how you are feeling mentally and emotionally. This is how we become in tune with our mind body and spirit. When you are frequently aware of your person you can sense when things are right, wrong, on, or off. The reason you answer "Im doing good" may be because it's not the outside world's business to know your current issues at hand, and that's ok. Don't allow hiding your feelings from everyone else to become you hiding your feelings from yourself. Problems don't go away without resolutions. Have you ever heard the saying "sweeping it under the rug" ? This is attributed to dismissing the feelings, disregarding the current tension, or not dealing with the issue at hand. This unhealthy practice leads to more wounds, more pain, and more hiding.

Dear Students,

Something that you may not ever hear is the practice of "checking in" with yourself. Don't let the first time your concerned about your own well being come from someone else asking "How are you?". Ask yourself for yourself. Mental and emotional health is just as important as physical health. You may be physically capable of doing anything but your mind controls your body and the will to do more. This simply comes from a place of understanding that everything won't always be "good" in life. You have to make the commitment to yourself that you will ultimately bounce back from the lows of life. You have to recognize the signs that indicate you are struggling. You also have to be mature enough to acknowledge your shortcomings and be willing to put in the work to be better. Never suffer in silence or alone. Share with someone, anyone who you feel has your best interest at heart. Share it with me. Share it with your trusted educators and family mentors who support you. I know everything can be good, but you need support when things are bad as well. In every life lesson, remember to keep going, keep learning, and keep growing.

-Dean Felder

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